Mother’s Day Metaphor

Last night I was alerted by Facebook that one of my estranged siblings, my brother, had used an old family photograph I posted to Facebook five years ago following my uncle’s wedding. My brother cropped me out of the original photo to create a Mother’s Day photo for his profile picture.

So what remains is a cropped photo of my entire family, sans me. 

For the first minute after I’d read the notification and realized what he had done, I was speechless. The heartbreak, betrayal, and sense of grief was overwhelming. 

Then, after I’d had a chance to breathe and think about it a bit, I just started laughing because, really, it is an absolutely perfect representation of what has transpired over the last several years. 

Those five individuals – my former family members – have remained exactly the same, preserved in a state of chaos and dysfunction. My life has changed dramatically, for the better, and has continued to improve with each passing day since I severed ties with them. 

But the only thing about their life that has changed is that I am no longer in it. I literally cropped myself out of the picture. 

It’s hard to remain upset when the universe handed me such a beautiful metaphor on a day when I really needed to be reminded of why I became estranged from these people in the first place. 

They will never change. 

I will never stop growing. 

Happy Mother’s Day to myself: the best mother I have ever had. 

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23 thoughts on “Mother’s Day Metaphor

  1. myquietroar says:

    My best friend is estranged from her family and I have seen how horribly hard it has been for her, but also how necessary, and how much she has grown and lived without them, sounds like you’re managing to do the same, be proud of yourself x

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Over the Hill Mom says:

    You and I must be long-lost cousins. I feel your pain surrounded by a family like yours who just doesn’t get it. There is a Chinese proverb that says:”Fish and family stink after three days.” With my family it’s usually just three hours. You are so right that it’s better to laugh than cry on my therapist’s shoulder. Love this post!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. e.Nice says:

    Wow Andi. That is some specialness coming from your birth family. I am glad you have created your own family and opportunities for growth and health and happiness that you couldn’t have accessed if you hadn’t moved on.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. breakingsarah says:

    Oh wow – is it bad that I had to smile because I have been exactly where you are with this? I too was a bit taken aback when it happened, but then had to laugh because it was just so ridiculous and transparent. My sister cropped me out of my SON’S family wedding photo and posted it on her Facebook page. Who takes things that far? It’s the ones who haven’t dealt with a damn thing and can’t grow up and move on. I laughed because it made me realize just how far I have come when they haven’t at all. Wear this particular badge with pride my dear! HUGS!

    Liked by 1 person

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