Today was Shit

Today was total shit. It started fine – I ate some breakfast and went to the gym. But as I was pulling off my hoodie in the locker room, I felt something janky in my shoulder. I figured it was just leftover soreness from last night’s yoga class so I went and did my cardio workout as usual. 

But then after I cooled down and stretched, I noticed that my shoulder just felt weird – as if it wasn’t aligned properly or something. I had my wife massage the muscles around my scapula and she said that their was definitely a difference between my two shoulders. Damn.

I tried just laying down to relax the seized up muscles and rubbed some sports cream on the sore area. But after an hour or so, it seemed to be getting worse. It was hurting a lot

Wife called our insurance company to ask where we could go for Urgent Care. Turns out the closest facility that was open on a Saturday night was a 30 minute train ride away. Fine. 

Except, when we got there, we discovered that the place our insurance company sent us trekking across our borough to find is actually a pediatric Urgent Care. Fuck.

At this point things get very fuzzy for me. I lost some time and then things don’t really get clear again until several hours later. 

I think the shoulder pain (trigger) combined with the frustration of not being able to find someone to check out said pain and being in the middle of a crowded (trigger), dark (trigger), unfamiliar neighborhood (trigger) was just too much. 

I’m home now. Wife drew me an epsom salt bath to try and soothe the muscle soreness. It was quite relaxing and I can feel my shoulder starting to calm down a bit. 

Hopefully this will turn out to be a non-issue and I will feel better in the morning. But if not, I guess we’ll try a different Urgent Care place tomorrow. One that takes adult patients. 


I am so done with today. I am so done with dissociation. I am done with it all. 

Very excited that tomorrow is the beginning of Daylight Savings Time and 12 days til Spring. But that also means we lose an hour, so I am going to pop another painkiller and attempt sleep.

Goodbye, Saturday. You were a bitch. 

17 thoughts on “Today was Shit

  1. lilylanders30 says:

    Disassociation does suck, I’ve been there. I’m sorry you had such a rough day, it does sound very trying. Pain, whether physical or mental, always sucks, as I know because I have both. I do hope that your shoulder along with everything else is better in the morning. Hang in there.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. manyofus1980 says:

    Awww Andie, safe hugs. Theres nothin worse than serious pain. Sorry the damn insurance couldnt even get you the correct care or treatment either. Tomorrows gotta be better, you’ll wake up smiling, I hope. XX

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Zoe says:

    Poo! I’m sorry you couldn’t get care when you needed it. I hope it’s nothing serious with your shoulder. Let us know how it goes, okay? ❤ Sending you lots of good vibes your way.

    Time change is going to kick my ass. I already feel it kicking my ass. Especially my sleep schedule.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Andie says:

      Thanks, Zoe. It was beyond frustrating. My shoulder feels a little better today, so we shall see how this plays out…
      I know the time change is hard on a lot of people. The first week or two always sucks, but the increase in sunlight eventually works out in my favor.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Grainne says:

    Your wife sounds so lovely. 🙂 It’s so good to have support.

    I have just recently had a nerve pinch in my neck that messed me up for a couple of days. Not having a working shoulder makes just about everything more difficult. If heat doesn’t work, try ice. I hope this morning brought some relief.

    Liked by 1 person

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